{"id":193,"date":"2026-08-18T12:14:41","date_gmt":"2026-08-18T16:14:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bowditch.com\/allinthefamily\/?p=193"},"modified":"2026-08-18T12:14:41","modified_gmt":"2026-08-18T16:14:41","slug":"back-to-school-during-divorce-put-your-kids-first","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bowditch.com\/allinthefamily\/2026\/08\/18\/back-to-school-during-divorce-put-your-kids-first\/","title":{"rendered":"Back to School During Divorce: Put Your Kids First"},"content":{"rendered":"

For many families, the start of a new school year is exciting. New teachers, new classmates, fresh notebooks, and the return to fall sports. For children whose parents are separated or going through a divorce, back-to-school season can also bring up uncertainty and anxiety.<\/p>\n

When school starts, it’s important to remember that your child isn’t thinking about court dates, parenting plans, or child support payments. They’re wondering whether they’ll make friends, remember their locker combination, or if the cafeteria will serve pizza. If you have middle-school or high-school aged children, they have the burden of worrying about class schedules, heavy workloads, and keeping up their grades.<\/p>\n

The best gift you can give your child this school year is the reassurance that both of their parents are on the same team.<\/p>\n

Don’t Turn School Into Another Battleground<\/h2>\n

It’s understandable that emotions can run high during a divorce. However, children should never feel like they’re caught in the middle of their parents’ conflict. That means avoiding unnecessary disputes over things that should be simple.<\/p>\n

For example, resist the temptation to buy an entirely separate set of school supplies just to avoid coordinating with your co-parent\u2014or worse, to make a point. Duplicating everything out of spite doesn’t benefit your child. Instead, communicate about what has already been purchased so your child has what they need without feeling like they’re living in two competing households. Your child does not need or want a blue backpack at dad\u2019s house and a green one at mom\u2019s house.<\/p>\n

Similarly, try not to argue over who gets the “honor” of dropping your child off on the first day of school. While it’s a meaningful milestone, children are often far more aware of parental tension than parents realize. If the conversation about first-day drop-off turns into an argument, the memory your child carries may not be the excitement of starting school\u2014it may be the conflict between their parents.<\/p>\n

Sometimes sharing the moment, alternating years, or simply following your parenting schedule can be a healthier approach than turning the occasion into a contest.<\/p>\n

Keep Communication Child-Focused<\/h2>\n

Successful co-parenting doesn’t require you to be best friends. It requires you to make decisions based on what’s best for your child.<\/p>\n

As the school year begins, consider working together on practical issues like:<\/p>\n